When Love Remembers, the Ego Unravels

Why Humanity Is in Survival Mode and How Love Brings Us Back

There is a quiet exhaustion moving through humanity.

You can feel it in boardrooms where everyone is performing competence but no one feels safe enough to admit they’re overwhelmed. You can feel it in relationships where two people love each other deeply, yet keep defending themselves as if they are opponents.You can feel it in the way we scroll consuming, comparing, protecting, bracing. We are not evil. We are not broken. We are in survival mode.

And survival mode is loud, its says:

• Protect yourself.

• Don’t show weakness.

• Be right.

• Win.

• Don’t need too much.

• Don’t feel too much.

The ego loves survival mode. It was built for it. But love? Love remembers something else.

The Woman Who Forgot Herself

I once spoke to a woman successful, articulate, deeply capable. On paper, she had everything together. In private, she confessed:

“I don’t even know who I am anymore. I’ve been strong for so long.” She had learned early that strength meant not crying.That being needed meant being valued.That love was earned through performance.

Her ego had built a fortress efficient, polished, admired. But when her partner looked at her one evening and said softly,“You don’t have to hold everything alone,” She broke. Not because she was weak.

But because love had remembered her before she could. It remembered the softer self beneath the strategist. It remembered the little girl who once laughed without guarding her heart a nd in that moment, the ego began to unravel. Not violently but honestly.

Humanity in Survival Mode

If we’re honest, most of us are walking around armoured. We are:

• overworking to prove our worth

• withdrawing to avoid rejection

• controlling to feel safe

• performing confidence to hide fear

Survival mode is collective now. You see it in leadership, in politics, in families, in friendships. Everything feels urgent. Everything feels personal but survival mode cannot access intimacy. It cannot access vulnerability. And it certainly cannot access love in its purest form. Because love requires exposure and the ego hates exposure.

The Illusion of the Ego

The ego creates an illusion:

“If I stay in control, I will be safe.”“If I never admit fault, I will not be rejected.”“If I don’t need anyone, I won’t be hurt.” But real love dismantles these illusions. It says:

• Apologize.

• Soften.

• Tell the truth.

• Let yourself be seen.

• Admit you were afraid.

  
  

And when we resist this unraveling, we often say: “Love hurt me.” But sometimes what actually hurt…was the ego being confronted.

Love as Remembrance

Love remembers:

• that you are worthy without performance

• that you are safe without control

• that you are enough without proving

It remembers your essence when you’ve built identities around coping and here is the sacred paradox;

Love comforts…and love ruins. It comforts the heart. It ruins the illusion. It holds you...and it exposes you and this is why so many of us fear it. Because to be loved fully means to be seen fully and to be seen fully means parts of us must fall away.

A Collective Conversation

On the 21st of February, we are coming together for the first live Gathering to explore this very topic:

When Love Remembers, the Ego Unravels.

Four voices. One shared inquiry. This will not be a conversation about romance alone. It will be about the deeper intelligence of love the kind that heals, confronts, humbles, and awakens. Perhaps what the world needs right now is not more control but more courage to soften.

A Final Reflection

If love were to remember you today…

What would it gently unravel?

Your pride?

Your independence?

Your need to be right?

Your belief that you must carry everything alone?

And if it did would you let it? Join us on the 21st.

Come as you are. Come armoured, if you must.

Love knows how to find you anyway.

Much Love

Sheshnee